Blending rituals can be beautiful, deeply creative, and very meaningful. I’ve yet to find a religious or spiritual path that doesn’t contain some sort of ritual for all the significant moments in life, from birth to death, and everything in between. And while the ritual may look different from one religion and/or culture to the next, the underlying psychological significance is the same.
Here’s an example.
Jewish tradition, as well as many Christian traditions (not all!), have wedding rituals that involve wine. In the Jewish tradition, weddings have a Kiddush, which is a blessing sanctifying a Kosher wine, and by extension, the marriage. In Christian faiths, wine is utilized as a central instrument of sanctification, blessing, and covenant as well. While Jews and Christians have different understandings of covenant in some significant ways, both recognize that marriage itself is a covenantal relationship between the two marriers, and it is understood to be “holy”, that is, set apart from all the other relationships that each partner has.
So, here’s how I, as a Jewish/Interfaith Wedding Officiant, have “blended” the Jewish and Christian wine traditions.
Under the Chuppah (marriage canopy) of an Israeli Jewish and Mexican Catholic Interfaith wedding ceremony (yes!) I had 2 cups of wine, the Kosher wine (Manischewitz, what else?) and a lovely white wine. When it was time for the Kiddush – sanctifying the marriage with the blessing over the wine – I started the prayer in Hebrew, “Baruch Atah, Adonai Eloheinu Melech HaOlam/Blessed are You, Creator of All…” and then, after a few more words, I went into an English interpretive part of the prayer that included: “…Just as the grapevine requires care, time, and nourishment to grow, so too has your love been nurtured by your families, friends, and your commitment to one another.”
After I recited the prayer in Hebrew and in English, the bride and groom simultaneously poured the wine that was in each of their individual goblets into a third, shared goblet. In effect, they were blending their respective religious and cultural traditions. Then, they each took a sip from the shared goblet.
In this way, both the bride and groom felt honored.
One other blending of wedding rituals stands out to me that I want to tell you about.
I had the honor of officiating the wedding ceremony of a Jewish bride and her Black groom.
A very significant Black wedding ritual is the Jumping of the Broom. This ritual symbolizes cleansing the marriage ceremony from evil spirits while also representing the couple’s commitment to each other to set up their new life together in a home they call their own.
I decided to combine this ritual with the Jewish Breaking of the Glass, in which the groom (or both marriers) stomp on a glass at the conclusion of the wedding ceremony. This ritual has historic significance for Jewish people, as it commemorates the destruction of the Second Temple in the year 70 AD by the Romans. And, too, it symbolizes the work couples must do to balance extreme joy with the reality of human vulnerability. Breaking the Glass reminds the couple that relationships are fragile, sorrow coexists with happiness, and mindful commitment is required to sustain a lifelong bond.
To honor both traditions, Black and Jewish, at the conclusion of the wedding ceremony, before the pronouncement of marriage, I invited the couple to jump over the broom, right onto the glass.
These are just two examples of how rituals from different faiths can be blended, and how they can co-exist harmoniously together, just like the marriers. No one has to give up anything. Humans, with all of our differences and nuances, can in fact live together with joy and a sense of excitement, as we learn all the colorful ways of being human, together.
It’s easier than you think!
Since 2021, I’ve been taking classes, seminars, and months-long certified study programs in Wedding and other Life Cycle Officiation. With all of this training, I’ve learned processes of how to get to know both marriers well enough so that I feel like a long lost relative (some people have referred to me as their aunt; it’s probably my white curly hair that makes them say that!).
What are “the processes”, you ask?
They’re simple. They’re my world-famous Questionnaires!
In all of my training and education from the likes of the Celebrant Academy, Mark Allen Groleau and his Un!Boring Wedding Academy, Bethel Nathan, and of course, the Academy for Jewish Religion, CA, where I earned my master’s degree in Jewish studies, as well as maintaining an active membership in the International Association of Professional Wedding Officiants, I am continuously honing the art of asking questions such that, when couples answer them, I come to really learn what makes them tick; what their values are as individuals and as a couple; what their courtship and wedding proposal was like, etc. Armed with this knowledge, I then weave their responses together to create a wedding ceremony that is 100% theirs.
I’m also open to as many meetings, phone calls, and texts as you need. You’re paying me to be of support to you on what will be, hands down, one of the most auspicious, momentous moments of your lives. The chaplain in me always operates by this motto: meet people where
they are.
If we’re geographically close to one another, I’m open to in person meetings as well.
Yes, quite frequently, actually.
Here are two examples of ceremonies I’ve officiated where neither partner was Jewish:
Thai Buddhist/Filipino Catholic Commitment Ceremony: We wove together a beautiful Buddhist Water Ritual with the text of 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8, “Love Is Patient, Love is Kind…”. Some of the text of the Cleansing Ritual included, “May the kingdom of peace come, may the will of heaven be done. May this couple live their lives in such a way that they create a sanctuary of peace wherever they are, wherever they go”. No contradictions with “Love is patient, Love is kind” here. Both partners felt that the Buddhist water ritual, coupled with the Buddhist and Biblical readings, were very complimentary. I loved the spirituality of it.
Agnostic Wedding Ceremonies: I officiated a ceremony in which neither partner wanted any kind of formal religious expression. The groom grew up in a Catholic family but no longer practiced any form of Catholicism, and his bride identified as atheist. But they did like the idea of a concluding wedding ceremony ritual. In getting to know them, I learned that they loved gardening. So, we created a never-been-done-before planting ritual at the end of their wedding. Since they loved ficus plants, I had them plant a ficus seed in a beautiful pot, and this symbolized the new life they were planting and growing together, as husband and wife. It was very creative, and they had a wonderful time performing this in front of their family and friends.
For better and for worse, English is truly the only language that I fluently speak.
That said, I can easily integrate a Spanish word or two into a ceremony (“¡Felicitaciones!”), or, if one or both of the marriers speak French, I can sprinkle a few sentences throughout the ceremony, parce que je parle en peu de Francais ��
As a Cantorial Soloist with a master’s degree in Jewish Studies, I am a fluent Hebrew reader, and reciting/singing any prayer in Hebrew is not a problem for me at all. Reciting and chanting Hebrew prayers are an intimate part of my vocabulary.
That said, I am not a fluent Hebrew speaker, so, I would need to work with a co-officiant if a couple wanted their ceremony spoken exclusively in Hebrew.
In a word, yes!
I am always up for co-officiating with my wonderful wedding officiant colleagues of different religious and cultural traditions.
I really appreciate it when an Interfaith couple wants their priest/Imam/minister, etc., to offer the religious prayers of their traditions, and they allow me to offer the Jewish prayers. There are certain traditions, for example, offering a prayer in the name of Jesus, or, saying a prayer in the name of Allah, that would simply be disingenuous for me to say, because I’m not a practicing Christian/Muslim/Hindu, etc. The opposite is just as true; a spiritual leader from a faith other than Judaism does not have the spiritual relationship to Hebrew prayers that I have. When an Interfaith/Multicultural couple chooses to wed, it is a beautiful thing to have both their religious/cultural/spiritual paths authentically represented.
I have always strived to be a good team player.
Have a question about your wedding ceremony?
We couldn’t have asked for a better officiant
Mitzi Schwartz officiated our wedding ceremony and did an amazing job from start to finish. She worked closely with us throughout the planning process and was incredibly accommodating to our needs. Anytime we had questions, she was there with clear, helpful answers. She made the whole process easy, and on the day itself, she led a truly beautiful ceremony. We couldn’t have asked for a better officiant and highly recommend her to any couple looking for someone warm, professional, and easy to work with.
Julie R.Summer 2026
